Narrator: And so, with the timely aid provided by Manwe, Lord of the Great Eagles of the North, the 15 companions escaped from the vengeance crazed goblins of the Misty Mountains. Traveling as far east as they were willing to go, the eagles dropped the dwarves, hobbit, and wizard at the western edge of Mirkwood, formerly called the Greenwood, and even provided them with a few rabbits and sheep for food.
Dwarves: Yay!
Narrator: However, the spirits of the company were soon dashed again when Gandalf announced that he had business to the south to attend to and would be leaving them to go the rest of the way on their own.
Dwarves: Doh!
Narrator: Sending them off with the critical advice that all they needed to do was stick to the forest path, Gandalf bid them farewell and the, now 14, companions made rather good time traveling through the woods.
Dwarves: Yay!
Narrator: Until, due to hunger, they decided to leave the forest path and promptly become surrounded and taken by giant spiders who, coincidentally, were also in search of dinner.
Dwarves: Doh!
Narrator: Luckily, thanks to his magic ring and elven sword, Bilbo was able to drive the spiders away and rescue the dwarves.
Dwarves: Yay!
Narrator: But now the company was hopelessly lost, exhausted, and starving in the midst of the Mirkwood.
Dwarves: Doh!
Narrator: Until they chanced upon a group of wood elves having a feast in a forest clearing.
Dwarves: Yay!
Narrator: Elves that wanted nothing to do with strangers and kept disappearing every time they got close.
Dwarves: Doh!
Narrator: Persistence paid off, however, and the elves finally grew tired of being harrassed.
Dwarves: Yay!
Narrator: And easily took the dwarves captive.
Dwarves: Doh!
Narrator: Using his ring of power once more, Bilbo avoided capture and followed the dwarves and wood elves back to the palace cave of King Thranduil of the Greenwood... errr-- Mirkwood. It's really all about skillful marketing, you know.
Legolas: We must take these trespassers to my father for questioning, straight away.
Fangirls in Audience: (squeeling) OH MY GOD-- LEGOLAS! YAY!!!
Fanboys in Audience: Doh!