I am the very model of a XenoCorp Fleet Admiral
I've information strategical, statistical, and tactical
I know the Kings and Emperors, and I quote battles historical
From the General War to Unity, in order categorical

I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical
About the damage weapons do, I recite with slightest ease
With many cheerful facts about the power of the PPD's

With many cheerful facts about the power of the PPD's
With many cheerful facts about the power of the PPD's
With many cheerful facts about the power of the PPD's

I'm very good at xenobiology of the strange and the quite diverse
I know the names of beings that are spread throughout the universe
In short, in matters strategical, statistical, and tactical
I am the very model of a XenoCorp Fleet Admiral

In short, in matters strategical, statistical, and tactical
He is the very model of a XenoCorp Fleet Admiral

I know the brutal history of Lyran and the Mirak/Kzin
The wussy cats use ESG's 'cause their hulls are so very thin
I know the control limits of the waves of the drones in flight
And that K'tuj in his frigates is a deadly sight

I can use a mine to smite the Roms as they try to hide from me
I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of the ISC
Then I can hum a battle hymn that Klinks will sing and adore
And whistle all the tunes that Monty Python ever sang before

And whistle all the tunes that Monty Python ever sang before
And whistle all the tunes that Monty Python ever sang before
And whistle all the tunes that Monty Python ever sang before

Then I can write a forum post in Vulcan cuneiform
And tell you ev'ry detail of Alien's Gorn uniform
In short, in matters strategical, statistical, and tactical
I am the very model of a XenoCorp Fleet Admiral

In short, in matters strategical, statistical, and tactical
He is the very model of a XenoCorp Fleet Admiral

In fact, when I know what is meant by "photon" and "magical"
When I can tell at sight a troll with words most un-grammatical
When such affairs as SPAM and rants to me are most dearly felt
Then reverently I wish to thee a vicious wedgie keenly dealt.

When I have learnt what progress has been made in phaser gunnery
When I know more of tactics than Stoney in a nunnery
When I've a smattering of the logic espoused by theSea
You'll say a better Fleet Admiral there shall never ever be

You'll say a better Fleet Admiral there shall never ever be
You'll say a better Fleet Admiral there shall never ever be
You'll say a better Fleet Admiral there shall never ever be

For my SFC knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury
Has yet to find the Grail of Balance, and that remains a mystery
But still, in matters strategical, statistical, and tactical
I am the very model of a XenoCorp Fleet Admiral

But still, in matters strategical, statistical, and tactical
He is the very model of a XenoCorp Fleet Admiral